Self Talk

Purpose

This exercise helps students become more aware of the internal dialog and that we have control over what we tell ourselves. We have a choice not to choose thoughts that feed into our anger.

Handouts

click here for handout
I found this handout in an old file cabinet in a church in Massachusetts. I don't know who was the original author.

Procedure

1. I start with a discussion about how people tend to distort our thoughts when we are angry and tell ourselves things that aren't even accurate and feed our anger. I tell a personal story where I caught myself doing this. I explain that with awareness, we can choose thoughts that calm us rather than make us angry.
2. I distribute the handouts, and we go around the room, each person reading one item from the handout. I always tell the men they can pass if they don't want to read. I also tell them that we will all pick a favorite and share it later, so if they hear one they like, they should remember it.
3. We read the handout as a group.
4. We then continue around the circle, and each person reads one that they like, and say why
5. I finish by suggesting they develop a strategy to use one of these statements or one they write themselves to use when angry.